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Mon, Aug. 29th, 2005, 02:00 pm

who what a big fuckin step in life. i mean i can't stop thinking aobut it. i have finally found somone that wanted to get engaged more than i did. it was kinda corny but she liked it. we went to the beach and sat there on a blanket and wathed the sun set. then we lit some candles and sat under the stars and then i perposed...... and she said yes!!!! so yeah i got her a nice 14 carrot ring and it has a .25 carrot dimond. she likes it so it's good. but yeah i got engaged.

next, i went to the twiztid concert in providence. it was the MUTHA FUCKIN SHIT!!! it was twiztid, abk, P.D.M (project dead man) and somone else but i forget right now. yeah it was so phat. we were outside chanting and singing and then some like crack head started dancing and pepole gave him money. it was funny as hell. then another guy came through like 8 times asking for spare change and i was like dude you got nice jeans, a nice shirt and othjer nice clothes and your asking me for money.... bitch go get a fuckin job!!! then at the concert randy met some fuckin girl and it liked pissed me off cuz we were there for the concert not to be fuckin ditchen are friends. the concert kiked ass though. i got autographs and shit but thats all.

got to go though peace out homies.....


Sat, Jun. 25th, 2005, 10:02 pm
what a good day!

WOW! today was a really good day for me. and alanna went to hermoms house and went swimming cuz it was so fucking hot outside. but that did not last to long because she thought that the water was to cold to get into. so afta that we went to her dads g/fs house and she has an in ground swimming pool wit a heater. so we went swimming there. the water felt so fucking good. it was like 92 degres in the water. OMG! then we went out for ice cream and i had an ice cream soda. OMG those are so good and i have not had one of those in such a long time. afta that we went back to her house and i had rented the movie white noise. if you beleive that there is somthing afta death, then i suggest that you get this movie and see it. it is so fucking awsome. it blew me away. but all and all it was a good day. the only thing that could have made it better was if i got laid. then it would have been perfect.

on another note.... catie i hope that everything goes well for you. i hope that this person and you go some where, and if you do i hope that this person could give you everything that i could not... which is alot. your a special person and i hope that you find what you have been looking for.

but to everyone else if you do not read this but i know catie will so catie i want to give you a mission. you can be like me distant midget secret adgent. i want to to tell people to call me all of the people that are my friends or used to be my friends. but i get lonly and you are like the only person who calls me. but idk can you just do that for me.. if you could that would mean alot to me.

well im out of this but until next time....

MMFCL ~ eric

Thu, Jun. 16th, 2005, 08:51 pm
Nothing New>>>>>>>>

so whats up people,
nothing new has happend to me latley. im trying to get this fresh ass jersey off of ebay. i also need to get a new hatchetman. life sucks being a broke ass ninja. so hows everybody who does not call me anymore. the only person that calls me once in a great while is catie. idk why she does. it is not like i am anything special. idk why she wants to hold on to what we have. idk. its like i told my g/f, im nothing great, i have nothing that seperates me from the rest of the guys in the world. im average. and nobody should ever have to settle for average. but she says that im not and that im as close to perfect as she will eva get. w/e. im kinda happy summer is coming soon and that means no more fucking skewl. WOOT WOOT!! yeah it seems like im going to be busy over the summer. i've got alot of things that i want to do with alanna. me and her are getting very serious. and i think that is a good thing. cuz i want a very serious relationship. the last one i had was 6 months 2 weeks 2 days 19 hours 32 minuets and 47 seconds. yeah no life but it is good to remember the past. oOo this might sound random but i was looking at who was on the list of artists going to the gathering this year and i got a fucking shock. it was like icp, twiztid, blaze, abk, jumpsteady, dark lotus, kmk and then it said FAT JOE (AND THE TERROR SQUAD)!! WTF is that!!! this is the gathering what the hell are they doing there. I HAVE NO FUCKING CLUE!!! but w/e. i guess they have some reason to be there. but idk if any of you feel like you still want to be my friends then drop me a line somtime and if im not home then leave your name number and a message and i will holla back as fast as i can. well im out for now peace!

MMFWCL~eric/jester the teenage zombie

Sat, Jun. 11th, 2005, 01:32 pm
to the day!!!!

well, lets see where do i start...

life has been going ok until the other night when my g/fs ex b/f started shit with us at the carnival. and it sucked ass because he ruined the night. he was talking shit about me but i was like w/e. then he talked shit bout alanna and she got all up in his face and then they were going back and forth and he was caliing her a bitch, and a slut and all that shit then i thought that he was going to hit her, so i got all up in his face and was like WHO THE FUCK DO YOU THINK YOU ARE BITCH!!! YOU DON'T TALK LIKE THAT TO MY GURL AND YOU SURE AS HELLL NEVA RAISE A HAND TO HER!!! then we were bout to fight and then he was like o neva mind w/e blah blah blah.. then like every 2o min i herd he wanted to fight me then he would be like o no i didn't say shit. then him and a whole bunch of friends got up and came ova to me and my friend t.j. handed me a knife and i stabed one of the little fucks cuz they tried to stab me. yup yup i went fucking nuts and lost it and put a knife in someone. i did not get cought. but then alanna called me and i was freaking out and i thought that i was going to lose her but then she was like o no i love you to much i would neva eva lose you and i was like ok but i was fucked up on some drugs but i will be ok.. then i went to bed and now i woke up and i am writing this waiting for my dealer to pick up his phone so i can get some shit. well nothing much else to say but this....


"Rest Of My Life"

I�m gonna smoke weed for the rest of my life you can find me postin on my porch
tokin my pipe-I�m gonna smoke weed for the rest of my life see some people gave in but I ain�t
given up the fight I�m gonna smoke weed for the rest of my life find me old postin on my porch
tokin on my pipe I�m gonna smoke weed for the rest of my life see I�m in love with Mary Jane I�m
gonna make her my wife

Sometimes I wanna get high travel up away to the beautiful skies
Float away and hope to never come down hope to see the day that I never come down
But what goes up is always bound to fall
I�ll I�m trying to say is that I live my life raw
I�m gonna smoke week the rest of my life and give all I got till the day that I die.

I�m gonna smoke weed for the rest of my life you can find me postin on my porch tokin my
pipe-I�m gonna smoke weed for the rest of my life see some people gave in but I ain�t given up
the fight I�m gonna smoke weed for the rest of my life find me old postin on my porch tokin on
my pipe I�m gonna smoke weed for the rest of my life see I�m in love with Mary Jane I�m gonna
make her my wife

When I look in the mirror I feel so low
I see my eyes and I feel the glow
I know I can make do let�s bless the sole
Show my love and let myself go wow
Everybody knows that I spit these flows and I drink my beer smoke my weed
But my head�s in the clear
Show your love respect the one your dreaming of.

I�m gonna smoke weed for the rest of my life you can find me postin on my porch tokin my
pipe-I�m gonna smoke weed for the rest of my life see some people gave in but I ain�t given up
the fight I�m gonna smoke weed for the rest of my life find me old postin on my porch tokin on
my pipe I�m gonna smoke weed for the rest of my life see I�m in love with Mary Jane I�m gonna
make her my wife

let us plant trees that bear positive fruits that enlighten our minds to the deepest roots all
the way to the core where the soul can stay true � where I can walk free with a joint in my hand
and I can plant plants right upon my land help em� understand these are natures laws my creator
had visions in the things he saw yeah � he saw � yeah my creator had visions in the things he
saw yeah�

I�m gonna smoke weed for the rest of my life you can find me postin on my porch tokin my
pipe-I�m gonna smoke weed for the rest of my life see some people gave in but I ain�t given up
the fight I�m gonna smoke weed for the rest of my life find me old postin on my porch tokin on
my pipe I�m gonna smoke weed for the rest of my life see I�m in love with Mary Jane I�m gonna
make her my wife

Now when the love is lost and your spirits are low
The world�s closing in around you got no place to go
Done all that you could to ease and please another soul
And in the end you�re in the cold, another sad story told
That�s why I make my own decisions on how I�m liven
Try to get by with the knowledge that I�m given
Can�t make me believe cause a tree is a tree
And when my soul bleeds, the color that I�m spillin� is green

I�m gonna smoke weed for the rest of my life you can find me postin on my porch tokin my
pipe-I�m gonna smoke weed for the rest of my life see some people gave in but I ain�t given up
the fight I�m gonna smoke weed for the rest of my life find me old postin on my porch tokin on
my pipe I�m gonna smoke weed for the rest of my life see I�m in love with Mary Jane I�m gonna
make her my wife

and thats the end for now peace out homies..

MMFWCL~ jester/ eric

Sun, May. 22nd, 2005, 09:30 pm
WOW!!! True Love!!!!

WOW!! tonight has to be like the best night that i have ver had in my whole entire life. Alanna and i came back to my house and chilled until it got dark outside. then we went outside and set up a blanket and some candles and had some wine glasses with some Dead Red wine and we had a romantic night looking at the stars, and i just think that we were ment to be there is nothing more presious to me then her. i love her more than my life itself. i have neva really cared like this about somone. and the best part is she cares about me to. we spend ALOT of time together and she never gets bored of me. i mean she says i get annoying some times but thats ok cuz it show that i am a real person and is always changing. idk really know what im trying to say all i know is that im finally in love again and nothing has eva felt this good.

And please nobody ruin this for me. everyone who just has nothing good to say about me just don't talk shit but out of my fucking life. i have a new life now and i am happy so just SHUT THE FUCK UP!!! so i will leave you all to think about this

ICP Lyrics

Ain't Yo Bidness Lyrics

[Intro:] Rude boy sittin pancaked on 23's
Clown Love to chicago juggalos
we underground like Blaze
my dead homie
and yours
we dead
we dead, no wait a minute... we don't die!
we don't die
we dead

[Violent J:]
Maybe i like bloody, murder music, you know shit like " stab your fuckin eye"
Maybe i like eatin shit like Tylenol PM's cuz 5 or 6 will get you high
Maybe i like punchin people i don't even know, i knock em flat up fuckin out (PAH)
Tuck some money in they jacket with a note that simply reads " i had to let some anger out" (sorry)
Maybe i only hang with weirdos, and hoodlums, and junkies, i keep em be my side (what up)
Maybe mam doesnt understand a friend is hard to come by, so i'll keep what i can find (My Boys)
Maybe i got 2 felonies, tattoos on my neck and i always paint my face
Can i still data your daugter? i mean i think i outta, i like the way she taste

how i act!
dont get slapped!
face slapped too!

[Violent J:]
Maybe i dont even like you, but i gotta front cuz your a record label guy (mother fucker)
What if i dragged you by the hair, into the street, and beat your ass, and put a boot up in your eye (Puh! Bitch!)
Maybe i would rather fuck a Missy Elliot before a Tony... "Braxton"
Maybe i would rather fuck a Mecy Grey before a Janet... "Jackson"
Maybe i dont have no self esteem so i like to pick on everbody else
Maybe when i was a boy, underneath my shirt i had bruises and welts "Oh" (its ok)
Maybe i was hungry, bottom barrel poor, and my mom was always sick
Maybe i'm lying, i'm just trying to find an excuse to be a dick, I'm a dick - dick
Maybe i'm upset that you left me, i'll ahng myself right above your bed " you should try suicide"
From the ceiling fan, so i'll be swingin when you walk i, i might kick you in the head (Stook!)
Maybe i got seven therapists, i been committed, but manager he got me free (Double A yall)
is Pills a day, i get so dizzy and high, sometimes i can't even see, (I gotta sit down)

how i act!
dont get slapped!
face slapped too!


Mon, May. 16th, 2005, 07:54 pm
ok for all ya'll

Ok first of all im getting pretty pissed of bout my g/f and my ex/g fighting through there friends myspace... catie i think you need to think bout what your saying if you are talking bout my g/f then you got some big mutha fuckin issues.. i know that you still love me but you have to get it through your head that we are not going to be wit eachother.. and you do not need to say shit bout my g/f cuz she is getting pretty pissed of and she's a fighter so you just betta watch what you say... but yeah all i have to say bout that is if you are going to continue to bad mouth my g/f then you are neva going to even speak to me again cuz that is just fuckin childish bullshit!!!

and on another note..... i can't wait for the new cd's to drop ICP - The Calm and Twiztid - Man,Myth & Mutant... them gonna be some phat shit...

on the other side i am glad to say that WEED has got to be the best plant in the world... gettin high wit my g/f and having fun is the best thing i could eva do.. im so glad that i have found somone so perfect for me she has everything i could eva want and more to spare... she is my world.... my everything.... if there were only words in this world to describe how i feel i couldn't even use them cuz she is even better than that and i all i have to say is ...... ALANNA I LOVE YOU!!!!

well if anybody wants to chat ya'll know were to find me!

MMFWCL - eric / jester

Tue, May. 3rd, 2005, 07:51 pm

Hear are some quotes :

[Jamie Madrox:]
All my life I've been living it all alone
I'm like a king with no people or a crown or a throne
And what I'm speaking on is what I'm feeling like
Do you know what it feels like to feel the warmth of the sunlight
I'd really like to know cause I've been chilling in the dark
For so many years that I question love in my heart
And I hate everyone, and I hate everything
Except for all the juggalos and the love that they bring!

What is it about a serial killa that attracts you?
And makes this music that you can sharpen an axe to
Taking you back through a hallway to a black room
No walls or ceilings, just doorways to pass through
You choose, chainsaws are always nice
But razorblades and knives are way more precise
When it comes to cutting, this shit here is an art
And we finish what we start, that's what separates us apart
From other motherfuckers, not saying no names
But them other motherfuckers (Ain't family)
And they say I'm sick, too sick
Well how sick do you get?
When you see a chest without a butcher knife buried in it
Wait a minute, give me an axe
I wanna smash your ribcage in half
For every time you laugh on our behalf
Will you let me another chance to redefine?
The mind of a serial killa

I be the maniac K-I double L-A
I slit their fuckin' throats and have
Sex with all the bodies, I'm a retard
People call me special though
I keep my victims eyelids
In a mennilla office envelopes
I split you like a cantalope
To see whatd on your mind
Smokin' trees, keep me find
well at least most of the time
Till i'm on your front lawn
Waitin' in the cold, the lights on
But don't look like nobody home

"I Wanna Be..."

I wanna be batman cuz everybody really ain't shit to me
My super hero picture me if I was, batman
Studios and shows
Utility belt with a compartment for the free rolls
Smokin' bat bud off in the bad cave
Jamie Madrox, (hidden message)
Gotham don't look shit like detroit
But I think these muthafuckas get the point
Listen, word on the street
About the arckon break
Scarycrow, poison ivy, catwomen, two face
All trying to kill me before the nightfall
But I got a bat suprise for each one of all
Scarycrow tryna front with me when I'm up in lakeside
Flash the batta ray watch the bitch nigga die

You're starin at a homicidal maniac straight out his biskit
you never know how deep shit can get until you're knee deep in it
So come along and witness things
Dark enough to mainstream
Sendin eyes wander through the tunnels
Of your blood veins
And if yall didn't know ? for hoes
Ain't no love for trolls
Better roll for you get stole on
Better, better get gone
'Fore I grab this axe start hittin your ass the way I usually hit this bong
Hit this moist and coochie
when I speak on point like se 'er fuck your 9 millimeter
Real stupid, your killaz carry an axe
either in our hands or in the haters back watch em drip like candle wax
Caught up in the wicked web created by the light of them
and now your homies dead I think you better call an ambulance
Talkin that, walkin that, can't nobody
fuck with me but now you're on your back and labeled just another casualty

Brand new, brand muthafuckin' new
Every MC in the vecinity is bumped to number two
Comin' out like freekshows and all y'all hoes that don't know
Y'all catch elbows, and get holes
Bitch you don't understand the dark carnival
The misunderstood realm of all juggalos
Called freekshows and made fun of from everyday
But when we return with axes y'all bitches run away
I'm a warlock, walk on water with wicked spells
Banished to purgatory, borderline of heaven and hell
See me for all that I am and all that I do
The multiple man appear in multiple's of two
Evolution of the soul took place in a cocoon
And we appear from the shadow by the light of the moon
We the nightbreed, walkin' amongst the dead
Nobody can figure out what's going on inside of our head

Don't be lookin' to the sky for birds or planes
All you find is the Dark Lotus spittin' the Black Rain
Bodies slammin' each other
on clouds makin' electrical sparks
That can be seen for miles in the depths of the dark
Do you spot the clouds with thunderous roars
That's when bolts start flying and rain starts to pour
Where you gonna run from?
Here we gotta clear view
of what electrical bolts you know that we gonna spear you

That's me,
the one you see awaken in dreams
Saint or sinner,
the message is embedded in the mixture
Hungry as they might come
Raised from the dirt and scum
and programmed to be no one

First time my knife touched skin
And the red blood started flowing so quick I just couldn't quit
Kept stabbing until everything that I seen was red
The pillow, the blankets, the walls, and even the bed
One color dominating everything like contemporary art
Am I the killer or artist with bloody heart?
Then I curled into a ball in the corner of the room
Feeling like a creep in the light of the moon.

Are they like closing in on me
Walls confining me, inside of me
There's an emptiness that won't go away
I never said that I was right inside of my mind
But I'm sure over time I'll learn to climb the walls
I'm sure that over time I'll learn to right all of my wrongs
Sure it's right, four walls reflecting my life
Every night that I sit and watch the replay

She was looking like a ?? but she was a little hotter
Then the average homeless bitch with the holes in the sweatshirt
Showing off a nipple ring scars and all
But the party don't stop until she loses her bra
Panties are next to come, Oh Double F
But her sugar ain't as tight as that hole in her neck
She don't need respect, she just needs some dick
And me and the Lotus steady in and out of that ghastly shit.

You ain't to fresh for death to want you
with ablities and talents no one could eva come close to
suppose you don't lose stay on track,
ya don't know if ya don't try always rememba that,
and rememba this in my eyes we all the same
you breath i breath we both share the name of a juggalo
respect that and charish your pride,
cuz we family representing all walks alide

I took the axe
What the fuck am I supposed to do with that?
It's all bloody
And it looks like its been in and out of someone's back
Grips on the handle, blood dripping down the neck
So I grabbed that bitch like *laugh* back
Who wanna get halfed up by the half with
Who got a gang of problems
And don't give half a shit, bitch
You can fall victim to the double headed furry
Don't be scared, be worried, man.

well those are my quotes and tell me if any of those fit me... cuz in my eyes i think that they are all apart of me...!!!!

well MMFWCL!!!!!

Sat, Apr. 30th, 2005, 01:10 pm
this is me

I found lyrics that tell who i am twiztid - afraid of me.....

[Jamie Madrox]
I am my own worst enemy
I'm not the smartest motherfucker and shit, I don't pretend to be
And why I am the way I am is not a mystery
My mind's not in proper working order or in therapy
The brain's confused and mentally abused
Life's been hanging on a string so what the fuck I got to loose?
And what the fuck I got to prove to you?
If you don't know me by now, you'll never know me
You can put that on my real homies
I got problems and they stack like bills
And I relate to the broken, bleeding heart love killed
And I awaited in the shadows, awake in the dark
Hoping to talk to the passed on, I'm falling apart
I'm such a mess and decisive, I'm fading away
I'm out of touch with society and living today
Never relying on my sanity, I through it away
To become the maniac that's got your attention today

[Chorus x2]
I'm so
Hidden and you're never gonna see
I'm cold
Forgiven all because of my beliefs
I'm no
Body that you ever wanna be
Cause I know that the world is afraid of me

[Monoxide Child]
Can you keep a secret?
Well I'm afraid world because they want me to die, can you believe it?
But I'm still alive... and been floating since '95
With my chin held high but I'm so dead inside
Let the problems just roll and put them back into a pile
Because it's just a bunch of shit that I can't deal with right now
And I'm tired of always guessing and messing it up again
And the next day it's even deeper and I'm steady sinking in

[Jamie Madrox]
I took a look at myself and came to grips with what I found
It was a vision of a child, disturbed and broke down
No soul, no heart because I gave it away
No time for feeling sorry, I'll grieve another day
And all those tears are stored in storm clouds
That hover above me and cover the ugly
Continued to haunt me when I was feeling low
That's the same reason I hold on and never let go

[Chorus x4]
I'm so
Hidden and you're never gonna see
I'm cold
Forgiven all because of my beliefs
I'm no
Body that you ever wanna be
Cause I know that the world is afraid of me

well tell me thats not me... MMFCL ya'll

Sat, Apr. 23rd, 2005, 11:35 pm
life sucks!!!!

well im sitting hea at my computer wit my abk face paint on doing nothing but hoping to die.... idk i mean everything is just going to hell... i mean i am falling in love again but can't stop thinking of the past.. people from my life who have neva been there are trying to be there now.... (father)... my mom tells me she loves me but then tells my brothers that she wishes i did not exsits and blames me for all her and my familys problems... i wish i still lived in taunton cuz my life was so much betta there... i barley have an friends hea.. nobody that was my friends in taunton barley call me anymore... i wonder if they were really frineds at all? idk life in general just does not seem to be going well for me i mean the gurl i am wit now seems to care bout me but i have my doubts though.. idk. Love - in my mind that is the scaryist thing in the world.. cuz you neva know if it is going right and if the other person feels the same way you do.. and then theres the fatc of you want to know if the person is being faithfull or not... then you think of past loves and if this one is going to work out.. all and all it is a new adventure everytime it happens and mine usually neva work out but i hope some day a person will really love me and show me the true meaning of love... anyways i will keep myself alive for all the people who do care bout me even though there does not seem to be that many.. well gtg.... call to hear more bout my life if ya care.. if you don't know the numba find somone who does...

well MMFCL - eric

Wed, Apr. 13th, 2005, 02:46 pm
nothign to do

GOD!!!! i am at alanna'a house right now and we are .. wel she is gonig to go tanning cuz she can and i am going to sit there wit my buddy mike and eat pistaios and listen to pycopathic music.. there is really nothing to do .. i got my info for prom so that will keep me busy and i still have to go and pick out a tux and shit... omg so much shit to do for a single night.. idk i mean i like it hea and i am really falling for alanna even though she dose not leave my nipples alone, gets mad at me for being stupid somtimes, andhits me in the nuts... when she dose not mean to or just a tap to make me mad and for "her" to win... i don't let that happen much... idk catie me and you still need to finish our talk and nero if you read this i would like you to call me somtime sop we can really ketch up! idk i am so mutha fucking happy... i got my myspace thing, i got pics of me and my baby, i got my hatchet man, i got my real pics of icp, twiztid, abk, and kmk,dark lotus, then i got signed autographs from icp, twiztid, blaze, esham, and i am getting my zug island one soon, i am also saving up for the lotus cross, a jersey from off hathcet gear the basket ball one and trying to get tickets to this years gathering.. any help would be appreciated... i might just get a jersey there.. idk well im bout to be out of this bitch like a killa who just nutted in a hood rat.... ya'll real Lo's and Lette's know what that means.. so until next time i write or if the carnival comes to town before i can... MMFCL to all my ninja's and ninjette's, zuggalo's, and hatchet riders of all shape, color and mental ablity... were all killa's on the inside muthfacku!!!! MMFCL


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